


Life would be boring if everything went as planned

by TheHobbitLover061014



Category: The Hobbit (Jackson Movies), The Hobbit - All Media Types, The Hobbit - J. R. R. Tolkien
Genre: Dwarves vs. modern technology, Family Feels, Gen, Humor, Multi, Quarantine Baby, Tags Are Hard, Tags May Change, The company in modern world
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-11-09
Updated: 2021-03-01
Packaged: 2021-03-08 19:41:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 6,988
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27472171
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheHobbitLover061014/pseuds/TheHobbitLover061014
Summary: It was only about 50 meters from their home when they saw a person standing on the sidewalk. Without a mask. Sam hoped her today's luck would be enough to make him put it on. She slowed down to tell him to put on his mask, but then she noticed how strange he looked.He had long hair with braids in it, and was dressed as if he came straight from the medieval times. Like, literally. He held a sword in his hand (who even has a sword nowadays?) and also had a bow and knives with him! And they looked quite real too.Sam stared at him for a moment.And then it clicked.Kili from The Hobbit.
Comments: 2
Kudos: 9





	1. Main OCs character descriptions

**Author's Note:**

> English is my third language, if you see any grammar mistakes, it would be a form of learning for me
> 
> Of course, I am not Tolkien, I own nothing except Sarah, Sam, Nat and Lenka

**Sarah** \- an aunt to Sam and Nat, she is a teacher, she is having online classes with her students since the beggining of covid 19. She is 39 years old, she is kind, smiles a lot, and it's just the kind of person that wants to help everybody. (She is straight but supports the LGBTQA+ community)

-Sara is 164 cm tall (googled it and it's about 5'4 if you count it in feet). Dark brown, medium length hair, isn't very skinny but isn't fat either, brown eyes.

**Sam** \- short for Samantha, she is an older sister to Nat. Sam is 22 years old and owns a small business: T-shirt design, stickers, digital art. Sam also makes face masks now. She's an artist, friendly and mature, she's bisexual.

-Short, colored hair (can somebody please help me choose the color? Or should she have more than one color in her hair? I am hopeless in choosing), she's fit, goes for a walk/rides a bicykle everyday, she's as tall as Sarah, something over 160 cm, hazelnut eye color.

**Nat** \- no longer needed, already has a pairing

 **Lenka** \- no longer needed, already has a pairing

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Can somebody give me tips for the pairings based on the personalities? Maybe even something like one of them having a partner in the modern world? I just know that I want Lenka, Nat and Sam to be with the young dwarves or be with OC girls.
> 
> Lenka is basically me but with a different name, lol. I want to study French though, but it wouldn’t make sense and I want to write an English fanfiction, it would be just weird. Lenka is from Slovakia ‘cause that’s where I’m from and I don’t know anything about life in the US so that’s why I didn’t write an exact country or town they live in.
> 
> Hope you understand what I am trying to say😅😅


	2. How it all began

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “I hope you don’t think we have so much bad luck”
> 
> Well, they do

_"Kili, Fili, check that cave for any traps! And don't take too long, the company is tired."_

The cave was pretty small actually. Big enough to fit the whole company comfortably but not more than that. They didn't find anthing that indicated the cave was a trap (thank Mahal they didn't, nobody wanted to repeat yesterday's scenario) but Kili still couldn't shake the feeling that something bad is about to happen.

Then he heard his brother laugh and realised that he had voiced his thoughts out loud.

"Oh, come on," Fili chuckled. "We checked everything a hundred times better than the last time. I even checked the _floor_. I hope you don't believe we have so much bad luck that something like that can happen twice in a row," Kili cringed at the thought. "Aaand go check the back, I already checked it once but I don't want to give uncle a reason to blame us if anything happened. Double check should be enough."

Kili still didn't feel reassured but tried to ignore it and went there as his brother told him.

He didn't even make ten steps when a black hole appeared right in front of him. It was sudden, he had no way of knowing something like thiswas about to appear right in front of his nose. His eyes widdened and as soon as he was not frozen in the spot with shock, he turned and sprinted in the opposite direction. Fili did the same. He ran out of the cave and slowed down a bit when he noticed that the black... whatever it was, didn't get any bigger.

"Well, Kili, uncle is probably going to kill us, you know how angry he behaves when he is concerned" says the still-breathless Fili.

"Come on, it was not that bad, and if I knew this would happen, I wouldn't send you there"

"Kili..."

  
"...KILI?!!"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I will try to make the next chapters longer but I don’t promise anything


	3. A great actor

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sam and Nat meet somebody (read: Kili) unexpected

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was kinda difficult to write, didn’t expect it will take me almost two weeks.
> 
> Thank you sooooo much for the two Kudos even if I don’t know who is it from, I love you guys!

Sam was on her way home, and what is rather unusual, Nat was with her. Nat was bored, extremely bored and she might be going crazy from the lack of social interaction. She almost jumped with excitement of seeing people in real life, even if it's just strangers at the post, each one behind a mask.

Ohhh, how glad Sam was that they haven't met a Karen without a mask today.

It was a great day, really. Or more like a perfect one. It was late August, the sun shone bright, but she could feel a nice cool breeze in the air. That morning, they all slept in, Nat made them tasty breakfast and then they just talked and watched _The Guardians of the Galaxy_. There was no rush that day.

Now they were sitting in the car, her sister pointing a particularly cute face mask she could try to make at home. They both laughed at the fact that she still didn't give up even as everybody knew how bad she was when it came to sewing. Then started a series of jokes and friendly teasing on each other's expense. Sam knew for sure something must ruin it, for things can never be so perfect, and especially not in 2020, but she decided to enjoy it while it lasts so they even bought some snacks in the nearest shop.

The sisters had a great time, singing along the lyrics of any song that came on, laughing and talking.

It was only about 50 meters from their home when they saw a person standing on the sidewalk. Without a mask. Sam hoped her today's luck would be enough to make him put it on. She slowed down to tell him to put on his mask, but then she noticed how strange he looked.

He had long hair with braids in it, and was dressed as if he came straight from the medieval times. Like, literally. He held a sword in his hand (who even has a sword nowadays?) and also had a bow and knives with him! And they looked quite real too.

Sam stared at him for a moment.

And then it clicked.

Kili from The Hobbit.

Sam had an unexplainable and absolutely ridiculous feeling that this is actually Kili, the Kili, not just some actor or a weird fan. She tried to ignore it. There is no possible way that a fictional character just appeared in front of them. She took a deep breath and pulled her window down.

"Sir, please, put your mask on!"

* * *

Kili's body swirled through time and space. He knew this couldn't be a dream, there's no way he could imagine something like this. He saw colors he couldn't even name, and couldn't tell how long it lasted. He felt as if he was there for only a few minutes and for months at the same time. He didn't have any control over his own body and his thoughts disappeared from his mind too soon to even register them. He kind of felt like he was flying through space but even years after this, his mind was never able to describe or comprehend what happened. Suddenly, everything went still.

Nothing moved.

Nothing made a single sound.

If the moving was bad, this was a thousand times worse. Is this how afterlife looked? If Kili didn't know any better, he would say so. But he didn't remember dying, it must be something else. Before, he couldn't think at all, now, with the silence and nothing to occupy his mind with, he started overthinking. And when Kili thought it must've been days, everything started moving again.

But this time a lot, a lot faster than before.

And then his body met a hard ground. His eyes blinked open, looked around a bit and only thought ' _Where am I?!_ ' before passing out.

* * *

  
He woke up feeling very dizzy. Kili groggily sat up and looked around himself. ' _Okay, my brother is not here with me, okayy, don't panic, just don't panic now_ ' He rubbed his eyes and pinched himself several times in attempt to prove this isn't real.

When it was obvious that it is real, he stood up but didn't recognize anything around him. In fact, everything was strange. The buildings resembled a bit to those of Men, but were built and painted in a way he'd never seen before.

Two colorful, shiny, loud things were now making it's way towards him at a rapid speed. He quickly grabbed his sword but the things just passed right past him as if they didn't notice him. His heart was beating really fast now.

He was in a place he's never seen before, seeing things far too weird for it to be a dream. And he was alone. Completely alone. No Fili, no amad, no uncle Thorin, no Balin or Dwalin to help him. Just him.

' _Okay, what would uncle Thorin do? What would he do... he'd surely calm down and try to find out as much about his situation as possible. Soooo what do I know? I was in a cave, and then a black hole sucked me in. I woke up in a place I've never seen before. The buildings are strange, they remind me of the houses of Men, but if they are houses, why don't I see anybody here? But that's off point anyway- what are those things? Are they alive? If yes, are they dangerous, or just loud and fast? If they are not alive, how do they move without a horse or even a person pulling them? What kind of witchcraft is this? And what are you supposed to do in a situation like this? I swear, if Balin ever told us and I slept through that lesson, I will never miss any lesson again_ '

The more he thought about it the more terrified he was. He couldn't go back where he came from and couldn't do anything here because he didn't even know where exactly _here_ was!

He was torn from his thougths when he heard another thing coming, also shiny, and once again loud, but it came from the other side of what he assumed was a road and it had a different color. He even caught a glimpse of a human or two sitting inside it but that was surely not possible, right?

That thing slowed down. Was it coming for him? Oh dear, what should he do? As the thing moved slower, he had time to notice it's partially made from glass. He had never seen a creature being partially glass. It confused him even more, if it is not alive, why does it growl?

It stopped in front of him. His heartbeat was frantic. One of the glass parts moved down, and Kili didn't know what to think. Behind the glass, well, behind the spot where the glass used to be, was sitting a young lady of the race of Men. He's never seen anybody so stangely clothed, and the lady was underdressed. Her clothes were made from a strange fabric and she had her mouth covered. He frowned a bit ' _Why would a woman cover her face? And that haircolor can’t be normal_ '

"Sir, please, put your mask on!"

' _Wait what?_ 'Out of all the things that crossed his mind, this was the last thing he expected her to do. A mask? Like the ones actors have? Why would he...? Or is the fabric covering her mouth a mask?

' _Soo, this is the first person I met here (is there somebody else behind her? No, focus, Kili), might as well ask her where am I. She doesn't seem too dangerous but that's exactly how an assassin would look like. I have a sword, I have weapons, it's okay_ ' he tried to calm himself.

"M-my lady, I'm sorry, but can you please tell me where I am? I-I am afraid I got a bit lost." ' _Since when do I stutter? You are just asking for directions... in a place... I don't... know... No, no, focus_ '

"*insert place, idk, some village/small town*" the woman answered "but put your mask on, or do you not have one?"

"I don't think I know what you mean"

* * *

  
"How do you not know what I mean? Just put a mask on!" this was getting ridiculous. Then she thought of something and frowned. "Are you trying to be funny or prank somebody? Dressing up like this and pretending you don't know what I mean? Come on dude, I'm having a great day, don't ruin it"

"I am really sorry if my question is ruining your day, but I really don't know what you mean, and I've also never heard of the place you just told me about. Can you point me to Misty Mountains? You see, you are the first person I've met here, I would really appreciate all help you are willing to offer"

' _Misty Mountains, this guy is trying so hard to stay in character_ ' Sam could feel the curiosity radiating from her sister. 

"Yeah, you're a good actor, great, but I don't want to deal with this, just put the mask on and go on, it'll be easier for both of us"

"As I said, I do not know where I am, do you accuse me of lying?"

Sam's strange feeling that this actually is _the_ Kili was growing with every second, and Nat leaned over to her and whispered "I just noticed something, doesn't he look a bit like that Hobbit character? He looks so alike him, do you think it could be Aidan Turner?"

' _Yes, Aidan Turner and this is a prank for some show, that's it_ '

"Okay, we know this is a prank, it was a good one, but you don't have to stay in character anymore" Sam huffed out in growing frustration.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Soooo, what do you think? Is it good or bad?


	4. NOT an actor

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okayyy, next chapter, here we go

_‘Thoughts’_  
”normal speech”

the skips are usually a change of POV, but it can be a timeskip. I tried to make it clear every time

* * *

_‘Does the woman actually believe I am an actor?'_ mused Kili _'Why would she? I didn't do anything to make her think so... well, let's try again, this may as well be my only chance to get help'_

"I suppose we ran into a misunderstanding, I'm not an actor, why do you think I am, if I may ask?"

The lady sighed and rolled her eyes as if the situation was extremely annoying. Then Kili's eyes widened and he tightened his hold on the sword as a part of the thing (adding this to the seemingly endless list of questions) opened. _'This cannot be a living creature, there are many weird beings but being able to open a body is just too far. Nope, this must be a thing. I'd still have to find out why does it growl if it's not alive'_

As the woman was stepping out of the strange thing, he noticed another girl behind her. They were similar in face, so he assumed they are sisters, even though the hair color was very different. But then, he couldn’t say anything about that, after all, his brother was a blonde.

The lady stood in front of him (not too close to him, which he was glad for, at least he'll have time to notice if she was going to attack) and said "Fine, let's say you really need help. Who are you?"

 _'Do I say my name or not? Uncle said it's not good to give out my identity, especially as a prince. Anybody can be an assassin. But then, she doesn't seem to recognize me at all and I really need her to believe me to help me..._ ' after a few moments that felt rather like an hour, he finally decided. He took a deep breath and sent a short silent prayer to Mahal to please do not let her be a bad person.

"I am Kili, son of Dis, of the line of Durin. At your service," he said with a bow, hoping he remembered all his manners.

As he stood in his full height again, and frowned as he noticed the female was actually not much taller than him, maybe only by one or two inches at most. Which was unusual, since she seemed to be a human.

"I am Samantha Clark. And I ask for your real name, not the character you want to be"

' _Wait what? Just a few moments ago, she said...'_

"I already said who I am. Now, can you point me to the Misty Mountains? Possibly the northern part of it? Or can you please just show me a map, that would be enough."

The woman seemed to hesitate a bit and he patted his pocked to assure himself that nothing disappeared.

"I have money," he added "I can give it to you, just please, I really need the direction"

She didn't answer immediately, but insted looked lost in thoughts. She looked him in his eyes, a piercing, searching gaze, and didn't move for the next few moments. Then as if something cracked inside of her, and she said out loud, but as if partly talking to herself "You really do look a bit lost, I admit that... how did you get there?"

"I-" Kili began, but then he stopped himself "you wouldn't believe me, even if I did tell you"

"Just tell me"

 _'I already told her my name, the name of my amad and which line I am from, I told her I have money, I am lost and I'm basically helpless, does it even matter if I tell her how I got there? She'll probably not believe me anyway...'_ he cleared his mind, tried to calm down and began talking as clearly as he could.

"I went to explore today's to-be-shelter with my brother and I got sucked into some black hole that suddenly appeared in front of me. My body flew through space and time I cannot describe. Then I woke up here, and you arrived"

"What in the Wattpad" muttered lady Clark, but he didn't hear it properly so he wasn't really sure of what the last word was supposed to be.

* * *

  
Sam really didn't think it was just an act. She is always the realist, even if she's an artist. One of the oddities she was proud of. And this confused her to no end. Kili is a fictional character. She's a realist. This was the first time in her life she was actually thinking something like this could be real. No, it just couldn't be.

And yet, when she looked in his eyes, she saw no lie. She was a great judge of character and paid attention to all her additional psychology classes. She didn't see anything that indicated this man is a liar, or that he's pretending to be somebody else. Sam decided to trust him. He told her his story. It was very, very strange one, but again, he didn't sound as a liar.

' _What in the Wattpad_ ' she thought, and probably even said out loud, judging by the confused frown on Kili's face.

She sighed and motioned to her sister to lean closer to her.

"Nat, please call aunt and hand me the phone."

"No problem, I really think it's Kili, do you think the fanfiction stories can actually be true? I didn't think this was possible, but if he really is from middle earth, then he doesn't have corona. Can we take hi-"

"The phone" interrupted her Sam. Nat can ramle for hours if she is excited about something new and they really didn't need that right now.

"Kay, fine, I'm quiet now"

Sam turned to Kili again and told him "Please stay here and be quiet if you want help, I will try something"

As she had the phone in her hand, her aunt answered it: "Hi Nat, why are you calling me, something happened?"

"This is Sam, and yes, something happened- but nothing serious and we aren't injured or something." She added quickly, not wanting her aunt to worry.

"Great, I'm glad everything is fine. Then what is it?"

"Ummmm, you see, we have a really bizzare situation here... we are almost home and we saw somebody standing on the sidewalk. We talked to him for a bit-" "you talked to strangers?!" "-and he claims to be Kili. You know, from The Hobbit."

"And?"

"And... I studied his every move and used all the information I learned in my psychology classes to find out if he's lying, but... he's not. And I and Nat also just feel that he's not just pretending. I am 98% sure that this is actually the Kili."

"Sam, I thought you already grew up from this..."

"I did! But I promise, this is not a prank or a something I'm making up. Or something he's making up. No, as crazy as it sounds, this is real"

Her aunt sighed and fell into silence. After half a minute, she spoke up again

"Are you sure? I need to know this is not a prank"

Sam hesitated for a moment. She looked at Kili, and once again was met with a confused and lost expression. "Yes, I am sure"

"Okay, then continue and tell me why exactly you called me"

"He told us that he went to search the shelter for tonight when a black hole opened in front of him and it sucked him in, then he kind of appeared here. It sounded as if he found a portal. He insisted that he doesn't know where he is, he's lost and would be grateful for any kind of help. I called you to ask if we can take him home for the time being."

"So you're telling me that he wasn't lying"

"Yes"

Sure?"

"Totally"

"Okay, then take him here"

"Great, we'll be home in a moment"

Sam dismissed the call and sighed. A car drove past them and she heard Kili intake a sharp breath. She turned to him and saw that he was terrified. Of the car.

This is about to be complicated.


	5. A place to stay at

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kili finds out he’s in another world and Sarah has a conversation with him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow, in the last chapter I typed “mom” instead of “aunt” and realized only a few hours after it was posted!😂😂 So I wanted to state, if you see anything weird, a grammar mistake, or a plot hole, feel free to point it out.
> 
> Also, a BIG thank youuuu to the first five people to give me kudos, I am very, very grateful for it<33

“talking”

_’thoughts’_

* * *

  
"Get in"

"In where?"

Sam opened the door to the car and motioned for him to get inside.

"I-I am not sure this is safe, can we just walk?"

Sam actually thought about it and decided it's a good idea to just walk home, since he's never been in a car and would probably destroy something.

_'How am I supposed to do this? Nat can't drive and I won't let her go alone with a stranger even if he's supposedly Kili.'_

Then an idea popped inside her head and she mentally facepalmed. How did she not think of such a primitive solution earlier?

"Let's do it like this. I'll drive home and return alone and on my feet. You'll just have to wait a few minutes."

Kili's face changed to grateful and relieved of sort and he nodded a yes.

And so Sam got into the car and drove home where she left Nat, then began to walk back to Kili.

* * *

Kili thought the woman is probably crazy. She talked to a rectangular black thing and pretended somebody is talking back to her. What did she think she was doing? And why was the other girl looking at her as if it was completely normal?

She seemed to have a whole conversation with somebody and then told him he has to wait here until she returns.

Kili was relieved he'll get help, but the moment they left, he began to panic again.

What if she didn't return? What if they just left him here? He nervously rubbed his hands and began to check what travelled with him through the hole.

He still had all his weapons, good. And his mother's rune-stone too. He had his money, his hairclips and beads. That was actually good, he didn't lose anything too special. Only some clothes, but basically still had everything he had after the Goblin Town. But he didn't have anything to sleep on, which was a problem.

He had money but didn't know how long it will last him, what is the normal cost of things here. He didn't know how far and how expensive was the nearest inn.

Suddenly a memory flew through his head, it was one of Fili saying, with a playful smirk on his lips "oh, brother, you what would you do without me? Your amazing, calm, brave brother?" and Kili snorted. Those two sentences had now been taken a whole another level and actually weren't just a joke anymore.

He had help, maybe the women were crazy, but told him they would help. But they seemed to be of the race of Men, and those never give off anything for free. At least not to dwarves. Especially to dwarves. Why didn't he place more bets with the company to win more money? Now he had to be careful and not take too much for them.

He tried to come up with a plan to get back to the company for a few minutes, and was surprised when the woman returned so soon.

He went towards her and noticed two things: 1. The woman didn't take the fabric off her face, 2. She held another one in her hands, made out of strange material.

She shoved it into his hands.

"Well put the fucking mask on already"

His eyes widened at her choice of words, he'd never heard a human lady swear like this. No matter what his friends said, he was quite observative and could learn very fast. He understood she meant to put the fabric on his face, and took the strings ( _'why are they stretchy?'_ ) and put them behind his ears. It was really weird.

When he looked up at lady Sam, she pinched the fabric in a place that was covering her nose and expectantly looked back at him. He repeated the motion and noticed it was much more comfortable as the ~~fabric~~ mask adapted to the shape of his face.

"Well, lets go" sighed lady Sam.

Kili fell in step with her and really tried his best to behave as gentlemanly as he could.

"Sooo, my aunt allowed me to bring you to our house. Please, if you want our help, be polite and listen to what she says. Also, there are four of us in the house, and all of us are women. If there is as much as hint of violence towards us, you will be thrown out."

Kili nodded his agreement. He never hurt a girl, he'll have no problem with such rules. A small part of his mind wondered why there is no man in the household, for he'd never seen a house where only women lived, but there was an important question burning on his tongue. After only few steps, he gathered the courage to ask, "my lady, you mentioned the name of this place before but can you tell me, please, where exactly in Middle Earth are we?"

"You aren't in Middle Earth, or anywhere in that world. This is Earth."

"What do you mean?" Asked Kili in a small voice, _'this cannot be...'_

"It is as I told you, I'm sorry, but I have no idea how this happened or how you can get back."

If Kili thought he was panicking earlier, he didn't know back then, what true panic was. _'Another world? How am I supposed to get back? What is happening? Why me? What if I can't get back? What happened to my brother? Will they ever find me? NonononononoNO! This cannot be true'_ Kili tried to reassure himself, tried to believe this was not true, tried to believe he will get back, he will see his family and friends again, but couldn't persuade his mind to believe it.

* * *

Sam noticed how devastated he looked, the terror in his eyes. She could see the panic rising in him. She looked at him with pity in her eyes- this must've been such shock for him. And in truth, she knew she wouldn't be able to process such thoughts or the reality that she may not see her sister again.

She cleared her throat to get his attention. "Hey, hey, it will be fine. I told you I can help you, so you don't have to worry about surviving here. And I know you're probably thinking about how to get back. Maybe I don't know yet, but a solution will surely present itself in due time. I am sure this didn't happen without some deeper meaning, such things cannot be accidental. For now, let's just get to our home and then start thinking about how to get you back."

She could almost see his thoughts slowing down, and hoped her words were true. She let him some space and didn't talk to him anymore while they walked, he needs to process it and calm down.

* * *

Kili listened to her and knew she was speaking truth. He must calm down. And yes, this cannot be accidental, so he will be fine and the company surely too. He calmed down, bit by bit. Everything in due time.

They walked past houses, very pretty ones at that, and lady Sam slowed down and stopped in front of a quite big house, opened the febce, stepped inside and motioned for him to do the same. _'So this is the house she was talking about... it's soo big, bigger than any house I've lived in before. They must be rich, but how? If there is no man to make the money... maybe they make the money themselves? If so, this world truly is very different compared to Middle Earth'_

The female stepped up the stairs and opened the front door. Kili followed her. As he stepped inside, he thought that yes, those women truly were rich. The house was a beautiful piece of work and he admired the ones who built it.

"Aunt Sarah? We're here!" announced them lady Sam. Kili gulped, becoming nervous. If this didn't work out, they won't help him.

Lady Sam put her "mask" down, and so he did the same. He still didn't know why, but he didn't want to cross any line, so he just followed and did what seemed apropriate. Another lady showed up and it was obvious this was her aunt. He swallowed down the nervosity, and began.

"Kili, son of Dis, of the line of Durin, at your service" he said, with a bow.

The saw the woman's eyebrows shot up in obvious surprise and she looked him up and down as if what he said was very weird.

"Well, hi, my name is Sarah Clark." She looked him in the eyes and her gaze was intense, searching. Then she looked at her niece, and lady Sam nodded. Then, she sighed. "So you fell into this world? Sam told me you need help, so, what do you need, exactly?"

"I would appreciate any help I can get. You see, I don't even have a bedroll to sleep in or a blanket to cover myself. I don't have food, or place to stay at, and worst of all, I have no way to get back where I came from" Kili said with pleading eyes.

"That means you would like to stay in this house with a bed and meals until you find a way back, I assume."

Kili's eyes widened, he didn't expect her to be so generous.

"Yes, I would be very grateful for that, if you're willing to let me stay. I have some money to pay you, though it's not much, and I can help you in almost any way, do almost any work you'll tell me to, in exchange for food and place to sleep at." he offered.

Lady Sarah put a light smile on her lips, "A deal, then. You'll help around the house, and I'll let you stay. But I have rules: 1. You'll never as much as think of hurting me or one of the girls, 2. You'll do as I tell you, and not protest. I'll not tell you to do anything inapropriate, but this is my house, and therefore, you have to obey, 3. The weapons are going off of your body and you'll not touch them while you live here"

Those rules were okay, he'll be very uncomfortable without his weapons, but it could be worse. "Yes, my lady"

"And stop with the lady stuff, my name is Sarah"

"Of course, miss Sarah"

"Great, welcome to our home"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What do you think?


	6. A shower

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kili has a room and a shower

_"Great, welcome to our home"_

Kili couldn't believe it, he made it! And he did so all alone, without anybody guiding him. Kili couldn't help himself but feel a bit proud he could do something without Fili's help.

"Thank you so much!"

"Well, off with the weapons. Now"

"Where should I put them, miss Sarah?"

"Uhhh, well... follow me"

She led Kili upstairs and into a room. The room was just as pretty as the rest of the house, from the bit he'd seen. She opened a wardrobe and told him to put his weapons there. "At least it finally won't be empty"

Kili put his bow, arrows, and blades there, but was reluctant to do so with one dagger. That one was from his uncle, made just for him, and given to him as his first weapon. It was a beautiful thing, and he didn't really use it, but... he felt much more comfortable when he had it on his person.

Miss Sarah saw his hesitance and asked "a problem here?"

"No, no, it's just... can't I have this one with me? I don't even use it, but..."

"But?"

"My uncle gave it to me as my first weapon and I never parted with it, please"

Miss Sarah seemed to think about it, and after a moment she told him "well, you must understand you're a stranger, it's nothing personal, but I don't want a stranger with a dagger, or any weapon, in my house. When we know you a bit better, you can wear it, but we've met each other three minutes ago. Is that okay?"

"Yes, ma'am"

"Don't worry we won't even touch it, and this will be your room anyway, while you're staying here"

Kili got surprised by the generosity, again. The room was quite big, it was warm in here, and not filthy at all. He looked at the bed that was so big in size it seemed it was made for two people to sleep in.

"This? For me? Really?"

"Yes" then, she remembered something "and put that armour away, too. There is no need for it. And nobody wears an armour"

"But what if there's an attack? What about orcs?"

"You are in a different world. There are no orcs, and as I told you a moment ago, nobody wears an armour"

"Oh" this was new. He'll have to get used to it, but at least this surprise was pleasant. It'll be great, not having to worry about orcs.

Kili took off his armour, and felt strangely exposed, _vulnerable_ even, without anything to protect himself with.

"Oh! You must be hungry! And tired! And you certainly look and smell like you should use the shower. Well, what should we do first?"

She thought about it, and decided. "A shower first would be good, I'll go buy some more food for dinner and Sam will clean your clothes... yes, and Nat will have to mentally prepare Lenka for the fact that we have another person in the house..."

It was clear she was talking to herself and Kili wondered who is this Nat and... Lenka was it? He'd never heard such strange names.

"So" she clapped her hands "the bathroom is that way" she gestured with her hand "the very last room to the on the right. Go take a shower, leave the clothes outside the bathroom and after you're finished, wrap a towel around yourself and wait in your room until Sam brings you your clothes back"

"Ummm" He stared at her, _'what is a shower?'_ Then his eyes widened as he realised the other words mis Sarah said _'I am supposed to return here and be naked, only with a towel around myself?'_

"What is it?"

"What is a "shower"?"

"Oh" she pinched her nose "of course you don't know what it is" she mumbled. "Well, come on, I'll show you how it works"

Kili was fascinated. If this was a bathroom, it was one of the prettiest and certainly the weirdest he'd ever seen. But where was he supposed to clean himself? Why are there such curtains? And there was no bathtub... miss Sarah opened the curtains and he saw a bathtub. _'So I guess privacy is it, then...'_

Then she pulled out a very, very weird-looking silver-colored object sticked to the wall and told him that's where the water comes from, then told him how to make the water run out of it. She also explained him where the towels, soap and comb is, of course.

Kili was absolutely fascinated. It was pretty weird he had to stand up while cleaning himself even when they had a bathtub, but _wow_. She got hot water just by pulling on a handle. She told him he can even manage the temperature by pulling the handle to the left or right. Up means more and down means less, easy. But amazing.

"And please, don't let the water run when you aren't actively using it. Don't waste it. Did you understand everything I said? No questions about the instructions?"

"Yes, clear"

She turned to leave, and at the last moment turned around.

"And please don't drink it, it's not... healthy"

_'Since when is drinking water unhealthy? Nevermind, everything here is weird, not going to risk it'_

"Yes, miss Sarah"

She left the room, and he recapitulated all the instructions. Once he was sure he was going to do everything right, he put his clothes in front of the door and braced himself to use the the shower for the first time.

It was so much easier than having to boil the water, or bathing in a cold river. He wished he knew how it worked so that he can redo it at home. It'd make their lives so much easier. He'd try to find out as soon as possible.

He relaxed as he felt cleaner than ever. He was born long after the Erebor fell, and that means he was very poor his entire life. His uncle would work hard, late into the night, to give them something to eat, to provide for them. And Kili was beyond grateful for it and uncle Thorin was his hero. But they were still poor, he was glad if he had some soap, and usually bathed in an icy river.

The soaps _here_ smelled amazing, and they were liquid! This "shower" felt amazing and he tried to memorize every moment of it.

After he'd finished, he dried his body, and combed his hair. Then he wrapped a towel around his waist and hoped nobody was standing in the corridor. After he got back to the room, he sat on the chair, and thought about what just happened.

* * *

Sarah quickly told her nieces what to do and went to the nearest store. She knew she shouldn't be leaving the girls with him, but she had a feeling in her gut that told her he's okay. She just hoped she wasn't wrong.

Sarah wondered what he would like to eat and decided she can't go wrong with meat and rice. She also bought more pasta and cereal. And things for some more meals she can do later on.

* * *

Sam took Kili's clothes to clean them and _ewww ohmygosh it smells so bad_. It took a few minutes, there were bloodstains and it was torn at some places. She'd have to deal with that later. It took her half an hour to get it (relatively) clean and dry, and went to give it back to Kili.

* * *

Nat was bursting with excitement. A fictional character?! In?! Their?! House?!

She to tell Lenka about it more than willingly. She knew she was talking a bit too fast, and Lenka is most likely didn't know what the heck she's talking about, but, you know, _details_.

* * *

Lenka was... well, she didn't know how she felt. Nat barged into her room and began venting about the things which happened in the last hour. Lenka couldn't believe it, but 1. Nat is not a prankster or a liar and 2. the excitement rolled off of Nat in waves, so something must've happened. She was amazed that a real fictional character was in the house, but she was not really the most social person. She'd most likely appear to him as a very quiet and oversensitive person. She'd love to spend some time talking to the Kili, but she also liked to spend the entire day in her room.

_'Well, time to get out of my comfort zone I guess'_


	7. An author’s note

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Eeeeeey, this author still lives!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, first, THIS IS NOT A NOTE ABOUT THIS STORY BEING ABANDONED.

I just want to apologize for not posting in quite a long time, and posting inconsistently, but I started posting and writing back in the time when I went to school in person and even back in december, I still had time to write. Now I simply have a giant load of homework, and even though I don't mind learning and studying, some of the teachers are starting to be assholes and any empathy just straight up dissapeared. The wording of the questions is way more complicated than it normally would've been and the expectations of the teachers (which were not exactly low in the first place) are crushing down my time to write.

Now, I do have a bit of free time, but every bit of free time I have is spent making art. Writing (in my experience) takes a lot more time (and more thinking since I have to switch to another language) and I just don't have three hours of free time everyday.

I will continue to write, and I have spring break now, so I should post at least one chapter (even if it was a short one) by the end of this week, if not, this is the reason but I promise I am going to try.

* * *

Alsoo, as I said in my other story, if anything about this story is kinda confusing, feel free to ask! If it’s not about what will happen in the future, or how will this continue, I will not give you an answer cuz I also don’t know about how the plot is going to continue. Buuuut, if anything just kinda doesn’t make sense, or isn’t perfectly clear, I will surely answer your questiont!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you guys are doing well and keeping yourselves safe in these times, and I hope you have a great day! And I wanna thank you for the lovely comments you leave on my works, I really appreciate it!


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